My mother-in-law thinks I’m ugly, but she always says my husband is handsome – she even hates my children being compared to me

A hurt woman said her mother-in-law “thinks she’s ugly”… and never praised her.

The wife still believes that her husband’s mother finds it “uncomfortable” when people say that their grandchildren look like their mother and not their father (her son).

The woman admits that “there are more important things than appearance”, but struggles to understand that her mother-in-law does not find her attractive.

She took to the online forum Mumsnet for advice.

“My mother-in-law never openly said I was ugly, but she also never complimented me on my appearance,” she wrote.

“On the other hand, she will constantly say how beautiful your son (my husband) is and how beautiful your daughter is.

“I’m starting to believe that she thinks I’m unattractive and not good enough for her son.”

According to his wife, she always praises her mother-in-law whenever she sees her.

“So she has a lot of opportunities to say something nice about me in return, but she never has,” she explained.

“I don’t want it to bother me, but it does.

“She praised my daughters saying how beautiful they are, but whenever someone says my son looks like me, she gets uncomfortable and doesn’t comment.

“Yes, I probably have some self-esteem issues and I think that’s exactly why her silence feels so deafening.

“If I was confident, I probably wouldn’t think twice – but I worry about how I’m perceived.”

People quickly asked the mother if she thought her mother-in-law was “jealous” of her and assured her that “it’s not uncommon to want to be accepted into your husband’s family.”

A psychological study conducted in 2008 found that 60% of women experienced prolonged unhappiness and stress due to their relationship with their mother-in-law.

Furthermore, two-thirds of wives believed that their husband’s mother often demonstrated maternal and jealous love for her son.

7 signs that you have an authoritarian mother-in-law

An overbearing mother-in-law is someone who craves control and dominance, according to Choose Therapy

Experts have put together 7 warning signs to watch out for…

1. She’s always around
   “An overbearing mother-in-law may show up unannounced or invite herself to meetings and activities,” they said.
2. She doesn’t respect your limits
   “She may do this by overtly denying your requests or, more subtly, in a way that makes you feel bad or guilty,” the experts said. “She can do things she doesn’t have the authority to do, like snoop on your email.”
3. She is critical
   “An authoritarian mother-in-law will judge your every move and take every opportunity to criticize you,” the experts explained. “Behaviors as simple as rolling your eyes or sighing deeply can be interpreted as signs of her disapproval.”
4. She insists she is always right
   “A mother-in-law with this mentality will insist that she is always right and that you should follow her advice without question,” they added.
5. She pressures you to do what she wants
   “You may find that your overbearing mother-in-law regularly uses the word ‘should’ when offering suggestions,” the experts warned.
6. “I do this because I care”
   “To justify her domineering and arrogant behavior, a mother-in-law may explain that she acts this way because she cares about you and your family”, according to experts.
7. She needs to be the center of attention
   “An overbearing mother-in-law may try to steal the spotlight whenever possible,” experts said. “In conversation, she may disregard topics that aren’t about her and turn the conversation toward herself.”

Despite these statistics, a staggering 80% of people argued that the hurt wife’s post on Mumsnet was unreasonable.

“Why the hell do you care what your mother-in-law thinks?” one critic asked.

“You don’t need her validation.”

“My mother-in-law never praises me,” said another.

“Never in a million years have I concluded that it’s because I’m ugly.

“I think you’re overthinking this.

“Why do you need her validation anyway?”