Jessica Biel wants people to talk about periods. Her new book, A children’s book about menstruation, released today, aims to help parents start that sometimes awkward but important conversation with their kids so they can understand how their bodies work, while also normalizing conversation about a topic that is often considered taboo: menstruation. Biel was inspired to write the book – created in collaboration with Period, a global nonprofit focused on advocacy and education — because the 42-year-old says she still has “genuine questions” about her own period and that “all my friends are saying the same thing,” the actress said to Yahoo Life. “No one knows anything. And we’re all just walking by the seat of our pants.
In addition to helping educate people about menstruation through her book, Biel hopes to end period shame – something she has experienced herself. When asked if she still feels the need to hide tampons up her sleeve, as many women do when going to the public bathroom, she admits: “100% yes. I make. I feel almost ashamed to say yes out loud. It is a complex, deep and learned behavior. How many times have I put this on my sleeve?
But now, she says, “I’m trying to work really hard to say, ‘I need to change my tampon,’ open my bag, and walk confidently to the bathroom, head held high. I’m trying to make a concerted effort to do this. But that little girl inside me still gets nervous about what someone will say, see or comment. Or make you feel like you might smell funny or feel gross right now because this is happening to you. It’s still in me.”
These feelings of fear and shame go back to when Biel got her first period at age 11, the morning she was supposed to perform in a school play. It’s a story she shared her Instagram. “I was scared,” she recalls. “I thought I was dying. What’s going on here? I was really scared.” Biel says she recently asked her mother if they ever talked about menstruation when she was young to help prepare her. Her mother confirmed that she did, but Biel says she doesn’t remember. “I should already be embarrassed,” she says. “And so embarrassed. I’m sure I was so scared I couldn’t hear her.
As a mother, Biel thought about how to approach the conversation about menstruation with her own children, in particular her 9-year-old son. It is something that also served as motivation for her to write the book. “I have boys – how am I going to talk to them about this?” she says. “I don’t want the same feeling I felt when I was younger, which was like boys thought you were just gross and weird, or anyone who didn’t get their period would make fun of you and that was shameful.”
For Biel, it is important for children to know about menstruation, even if it does not directly affect them. “If they don’t have that information, they won’t be able to respond compassionately,” she says, adding, “I want my guys to have language around this. I want them to be included in the conversation.”
Biel encourages parents to use her book as a tool to start having open conversations about menstruation with their children. “We don’t want you to just hand the book to your kids,” she says. “The idea is to sit down and open the book together. It’s the first step on the path to: Here’s just the real information and maybe you’ll feel inspired to find more resources, or your kids will ask more questions and you can find answers together.” She adds that while families have to choose the right time to have these conversations, “I think we don’t give our young people enough credit about what they can actually handle.”
Looking back, Biel wishes her younger self knew that there is a range of what is considered normal when it comes to menstrual cycles. “Your period may come and then go,” she says. “My period came when I was 11 and didn’t come back for a year. All these different things that happen in different people’s cycles are normal and okay. Knowing it won’t just be like clockwork every month, I think would have helped make it less embarrassing.”
Biel wants to convey the message to young readers that “you can do anything during your period. If that’s what makes you feel good in that moment, do it,” she says. “You are capable no matter what. But also, if you want to stay home today and rest, watch a movie and go out, it’s okay to do that too.”
