I was told my cancer symptoms were menopause and I have 4 years to live… I want to make the most of the time I have left

KATY Stephenson, 49, is a real estate agent.

She lives in Bury St Edmunds with her husband Patrick, 56, an architect, and children Jack, 18, and Tilly, 15.

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Sitting in the consultant’s office, I looked at the nurses on either side of me in utter disbelief.

The serious-looking doctor had just told me that I had ovarian cancer and I couldn’t believe it.

Would I die and leave my two children, then 15 and 12, to grow up without me?

It was January 2021, and a month earlier, I had gone to the emergency room after feeling pain on the right side of my stomach.

Blood tests, an ultrasound and a CT scan revealed that I had appendicitis and showed changes in the cells in my ovary and fallopian tubes.

Three days later, my appendix was removed and a sample of my left fallopian tube and ovary was taken for biopsy.

One of the doctors said that although it was probably nothing to worry about, there was a chance it was cancer.

Hearing that word was horrible. After five days in the hospital, I was released, but I didn’t hear from him until a month later, when I was asked to come back for the biopsy results.

During this time I was initially very anxious, but after three weeks I assumed it couldn’t be serious if no one had been in touch, so I attended the appointment alone.

It was there that I received the devastating news that I had stage one ovarian cancer.

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It was a huge shock and although it was an aggressive cancer, it was detected early.

I had visited my GP six months before my diagnosis with a range of symptoms including going to the toilet more frequently, bloating quickly after eating and abdominal pain, but they said it was perimenopause.

When I told my husband, I broke down. He comforted me before we told the kids. Tilly started crying and asked if I was going to die, and Jack was very quiet.

Two weeks later, I had a total hysterectomy, which included removal of my ovaries and fallopian tubes, and began five months of chemotherapy in February 2021.

I plunged into surgical menopause, experiencing hot flashes, insomnia, brain fog, fatigue, steroid swelling, and neuropathy – aka pain, numbness and tingling in my fingers and toes – all caused by chemotherapy.

I’ve always been a size 10, but I went up a dress size. I was so angry because I no longer looked or felt like myself.

Then, that June, I was told there was no evidence of illness and that I would be monitored with blood tests every three months. I felt so relieved and ready to move on with life.

But in September 2022, my consultant called with horrible news. Tests to monitor my CA 125 levels – an indicator of ovarian cancer – revealed that they had increased enormously.

A scan confirmed that the cancer had spread to my abdominal cavity and was now incurable.

They told me I had four years to live, but no one knew for sure.

The following month I had extensive surgery on my abdominal cavity, more chemotherapy, and was given medication to destroy the growth of cancer cells.

But when I couldn’t tolerate it, I switched medications, which a new oncologist said could give me two or three years.

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Every two months my blood tests are checked and my results in May were stable.

Living with incurable cancer is difficult. My whole family goes to therapy and I’ve learned that the best gift I can give my children is to be as normal as possible.

In January, I discovered The Lady Garden Foundation, a charity that raises awareness of gynecological health. Through this, I talk about my experience to help other people.

My family is my priority and this year I have a lot to look forward to – my 20th wedding anniversary, my 50th birthday and three family holidays.

I have accepted that I have incurable cancer, but I can still live life fully.

I tell myself I’m not dying of cancer, I’m living with it.

No one knows when they will die and I am determined to make the most of the time I have left.”